Dear Mum & Dad, absence makes the heart grow fonder...

dayanemarinho

On leaving the nest...

Going away to college also means leaving home for most people. Whether it's a 45 minute drive, or an hour plane ride to a different state. I don't think I know anyone here, native or foreigner that doesn't have pangs of homesickness every once in a while. A lot of people I know have the luxury to be able to go home pretty much whenever they want because they live so close, or live just a state or two away that airfare isn't too costly.

But for kids like me, going home means dropping close to $2000 on plane tickets, and about a two day whirlwind journey involving waiting for hours at gates, running through airports to make that connecting flight and trying desperately to sleep during a 14+ hour plane ride.

So, at Christmas we don't go home. During semester breaks we don't go home. Long weekends, public holidays, we're here, chillin' in the dorms.

In short, we don't see our parents often. If we get to go home, we go home once a year only and try to make the most of it. This means we have to keep in contact with our parents in other ways...enter Skype.

Skype is great. It has chat, video and voice capabilities and dammit, it's FREE. And very user friendly. Hurrah! Doesn't change the fact that there's a 12-13 hour time difference (depending on daylight savings) between America and South East Asia.

Add on to this time difference a busy university schedule, and your folks' weekly schedule, finding the right time to get on Skype can really be a pain.

It's really easy to get caught up in the great adventure that university is. You make new friends, explore the new place where you live, maybe you get a job, maybe you join a club. Then you start having midterms, papers to write, meetings to attend...and before you know it maybe you've been neglecting mum and dad. And they're upset and disappointed but maybe you think that it's just natural that you don't have time.

But look at it this way - for you going off to uni is HUGE. Everything is new, everything is shiny. There's so much to see and experience and so many things to get used to, you're like a new born fawn. But for mum and dad everything in their life is exactly the same, minus your presence. They're not used to not seeing you everyday. And that freaks them out. It freaks you out too, but you have so many distractions that you're not thinking about it all the time. But they are. Your mum is probably suffering from separation anxiety, like a 4 year old on the first day of nursery school.

Write them an email every other day. Even if it's short. Let them know you're thinking about them, tell them you miss them. Plan to skype them once a week, so they can see your face and hear your voice, and you can see them. Always remember birthdays. Tell them who your friends are, who the important people in your life are now that you've left home.

You're (supposedly) an adult now, so do the adult thing and pay attention to your parents and your family.

I promise I'll do it too.

Dear Mum & Dad, it's cold outside...

electroluminescence

It's a little unbelievable that my first year of university is nearing its end. In just over a month I'll be flying back to the place that I call home, and trading in this American landscape for 100% humidity, ridiculous sunshine, palm trees. Oh, and the sight of my family. They're kinda important, shouldn't forget them.

But, speaking of the vast difference in weather between South East Asia and Northeastern America...

One thing I remember that my uni counsellor mentioned, but probably didn't impress upon us enough (and that we all probably ignored) was the effect weather has on your psyche. Every one of us picked schools based on our own personal preferences - tailored slightly by our parents' wishes - and I don't know about you, but I definitely didn't give much thought to weather. The weather in the region where I grew up has four seasons: hot & dry, very hot & dry, hot & wet, and very hot & wet. There are also four seasons where I currently go to school, however these four seasons are: spring, summer, autumn and winter.

It's currently spring, and spring is a lovely season because everything is blooming and it's not too hot, but it's not chilly either. Autumn is visually arresting in its blaze of reds, oranges and yellows, cold yes, but with room for one to dress fashionably. Winter though...Do not be fooled by quaint postcards and romantic descriptions in novels of crisp white snow and gorgeous firesides. Winter starts in Decemberish and extends through until around about March. Snow may be pretty as it falls, but when you add violent wind to it and the snow is in your eyes, nose and mouth it starts to look less pretty. You will not understand the expression "bitter cold" until you've experienced below freezing weather for four, five, six plus days straight. Sometimes it's cold enough to chill you to your bones, but not cold enough for snow, so what happens? The snow melts, and then it rains. Freezing rain. Which means ice everywhere, on every pathway and sidewalk. Which leads to many bruised and battered college students.

I'd never really shivered until I came here. I'd never taken so long to get dressed before being able to venture outside. Not to mention, winter clothes are damn expensive! Gloves, boots, scarves, earwarmers, hats, sweaters, t-shirts...the list goes on.

The first time I saw snow fall it was rather lovely and magical in a way. But I was quickly pining for my palm trees and my humidity.

So, think about the weather wherever you're planning to go for college. Stock your wardrobe accordingly, and don't be surprised when the seasonal depression kicks in. The weather is more important than you think.

Tip: Don't leave your dorm without knowing what the weather is like outside.